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Post by mat970 on Jan 18, 2011 13:22:05 GMT -5
Hi, im Mat, 18 years old. Ive been actively seeking to find out what i am. This isnt the first webiste ive been to, but probably the 10th. I have to research and find out whats going on before i jump to conclusions. I believe i have awakened and and am a sang and psy vamp. Its been about a year and four months since this has began. A friend of mine directed me to a website about vampires, (which i dont happen to have on me), and as i kept reading the website so many things clicked into place. I had always been meeting strange people since i was about 6, which i had thought wernt too right to me at the time, but now i see that these could have been my best friends. So many things changed and i noticed how different i had been. I've become very anti-social, (which actually makes it hard for me to type this). I have a calling to the night where i remain awake restless in bed and ocasionally i go downstairs and walk around because i cant sleep. During the day its hard for me to go into the sunlight because my eyes become very sensitive to the light. During the daya i seem alot slower then i do at night. My sleeping patterns vary hugely, from taking very long naps during the day to barely sleeping at all. Even as i type right now my throat is so dry and nothing i drink takes care of it. Ive read numerous awakening posts on different websites and many websites about vampires. at around 10 i began to become distant to almost anyone i knew. It seems like people either hate me or love me. The people that im around often say they get very tired when they're around me. I dont know if psychic abilities come with vampirism or if this is another different thing that i have. I often have numerous pastlife visions which ive began to keep a track of. I can see spirits and communicate with them too, aand its been tragic what i deal with. Most of the spirits come to me because something is wrong. I get to see murder anad the bad in life every day. I feel like im exiled and theres no where for me to go. I get numerous migrains and headaches from being in the sun, and i have to be in a cold dark room for me to be okay, even then, the smallest light can trigger a headache. When i get near crowds of large people i feel like i have to get away from them, but also when im alone i become very tired. Idk if hearing heartbeats is a part of this too but i hear them through my hand, all i have to do is hold out my palm towards a group of people and i can feel their heartbeats from where im standing. Ive come here in search of help and acceptance. I hope that this fourm can help me. Thanks in advance
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Post by bomb on Jan 18, 2011 15:21:21 GMT -5
wow that was a lot of writing. i can pretty much guarantee that this is the most accurate site youll visit , besides psivamp or sanguinarius, which is where the majority of my information comes from. just feel free to ask any questions
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Post by mat970 on Jan 18, 2011 17:08:50 GMT -5
I make sure im through, I just got back from the doctors -.-. Ive had it fairly rough because i dont actually have any donors. i think by now i mostly psy feed instead of getting from blood. I definatly have most of the awakening symptoms that were on this site with the exception of 1 or two. I have extreme moodswings which i know isnt normal for a guy to have. While depression does probably play into it, i dont think that can explain all of it. I know some psychic abilities come with being a psy vamp, but do any of the other psychic abilities come with being psy? I have many heightened senses. I can hear and tune in on multiple conversations at school, which tends to drive me crazy. And also being raised up in a bad household doesnt really help things along either. Through this last year and 4 months ive mostly tried to teach myself, i dont think i can take it anymore. Ive already found out i have psychic abilities. I had questions i wanted to ask its just my lack of concentration at the moment is making it hard for me to remember.
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Post by bomb on Jan 19, 2011 16:01:21 GMT -5
take your time, im not going anywhere anytime soon. also psychic abilities cannot be really chosen. we can train them, but unless they are latent, training can only produce limited results. for example, anyone can train themself to see auras- even regular people. but it just comes naturally to psychics, even if they havent been trained in it. another thing is psychic feeding and shielding. psy feeding can be learned b any vampire, though to sanguinarians, its use is limited. shielding can be learned by anyone, similarly to learning to see auras.
one thing that cannot be learned however, is deathsight. this is usually a born condition, jsut like vampirism. it can also be awoken just like vampirism, though usually after some major even in the persons life. most people can generally sense when there is a spirit around, especially if you can see auras, or have empathy, such as myself. but only certain people can actually see and communicate to them.
also, mood swings isnt neccesarily female. the only thing i would say that is unique to females, is the obvious physical characteristics and menstral cycles. anyone can be anything, humans are the most diverse beings on the planet!
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Post by mat970 on Jan 19, 2011 18:50:27 GMT -5
Most of the psychic abilities i have just came natural to me, or they were awakened. ive had numerous tragic events in my life time. I also do have empathy, i can feel peoples emotions across the room, i tend to even feel spirits emotions too. It really sucks when i walk into school and i dont know which emotions im actually feeling because i end up feeling everyone elses. I havent tried to train myself in learning how to do anything new, anything ive mentioned has come naturally to me, id even say i had no prior knowledge of these conditions i have until they revealed themselves. One of my friends i know actually has a medical case of vamprisim, and shes had it for a quite a while. But recently her heart rate has been slowly dropping and so has her body temperature, is this even possible? because it sounds a little odd if you ask me.
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Post by bomb on Jan 19, 2011 22:25:37 GMT -5
This friend of yours, you've actually felt her heart? in the medical world, clinical vampirism is commonly referred to as renfields syndrome, its really the only socially accepted way of describing a general thirst for blood, accompanied by the symptoms to a doctor. Skin temperature varies form person to person, i myself generally have colder skin, though not at all times. the drop in heart rate is not normal, and if it is in fact happening, i would suggest getting it checked out as soon as possible. Tell me more about your psychic experiences, i always find stories most fascinating.
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Post by mat970 on Jan 19, 2011 23:23:37 GMT -5
I personally havent been able to feel it. Im kind of curious to see if its really happening, but she lives farther away from me. I have several different psychic experiences. The very first one i had was when i was about 6, living in a small house with my family, it was kind of late at night. I had gotten up to get a drink of water. My bedroom is at the very end of a hallway so i see this spirit standing infront of my door, he looked to be a young man or older teen. I almost screamed and darted off inside my door. I locked it and i felt very scared. But i have a feeling this spirit has followed me. Its like with your first you remember it so well. What scared me the most is i had seen a bullet hole in his chest. I can still connect into his feelings and i had automatically picked up things about him and his family. words, colors, and different visons come to me when i try to focus on a spirit, and im still trying to figure out more about my first spirit. I've had numerous late nights where ive heard things and when i goto ask my parents if they heard it, they say they heard nothing, which scares me even further. I even have a feeling a spirit is in my current house. At times ill set something down like my wallet or my ipod, the next second i turn back to look at it and i find it moved onto a different table or onto my nightstand. I had a creepy experience at a graveyard after dark. Its one of those thrill seeking opportunities id like to do more often, it just gives me a chance to work with my skills. Ive already had numerous past life visions which i believe to know are mine. i have about 5 or 6 of them, some really scare me, and others are almost like me.
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Post by bomb on Jan 20, 2011 0:36:28 GMT -5
colors words and sounds are often associated with inexperienced mediums. their brain cannot handle the truth yet, so it breaks it down into simpler elements. or so my theory is. also i have been experiencing things with my hearing lately as well. though i think mine is developing clairvoyance, a very interesting and exciting tool. though mine is only limited to hearing single letters, i hope it will be better in the future. I wonder if its a blessing or a curse being able to hear the thoughts of others.
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Post by mat970 on Jan 20, 2011 11:56:09 GMT -5
It tends to be both ways, both a blessing and a curse, with feeling the emotions of other people. As of right now yes i am very inexperienced with all the psychic powers i have, im trying to develop them but it often takes alot. Its so hard to tel day in and daya out which emotions are mine because i havent figured out how to stop it, it just does its own thing. Im working on making it day to day so somethings take priority over others. I just got out of bed literally like a few minutes ago. Slept from like 10 last night to 10 this morning. I havent been feeling well the past few days. Doctor says its like a mix of my sinuses and the common cold even though ive had flu shot this year.
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Post by bomb on Jan 20, 2011 13:18:19 GMT -5
sickness happens to everyone, sometimes more than others. some empaths are more sensitive than others as well. for me only the strongest emotions flood me, such as laughter or crying. pain can also affect me, my body is usually just achy all over.
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Post by mat970 on Jan 20, 2011 13:31:04 GMT -5
I normally ache all over, have some sinus/allergy problems, but its usually not to bad. If its really bad i can be down for a few days. In december i had issues with headaches/migrains for a whole week. I pick up every little emotion, im basically super sensitive. I get an immediatle rush of emotions as i go in school. Before school starts, we have to sit in the cafeteria before we can go off to class, and theres literally a hundred people in the cafeteria before school starts. I deal with i every day.
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Post by bomb on Jan 20, 2011 13:33:45 GMT -5
its probby easier for me to deal with, since i go to a much smaller school. we usually only have about 50 there on a daily basis.
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Post by mat970 on Jan 20, 2011 13:41:16 GMT -5
Lucky, we have a couple hundred, like 20 in each class, our lunch room is filled during lunch, and we have to have 2 different lunch periods. But i pick up every little emotion, i tune in onto 4 or 5 different conversations at a time.
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