Post by skulave on Sept 17, 2015 1:08:59 GMT -5
Where should I begin? I guess I will start when my life changed to what it is now. All of this began 4 years ago when I turned 25. A lot of things were changing that year, I had my first job after earning my degree, I was getting married soon, and I was buying my first home. I remember waking up one morning and having a bad headache. This headache didn't go away for weeks. I chalked it up to stress at the time and carried on with my life for awhile. A few months after everything was settled and the stress should have been gone, the headaches were still happening. I noticed the moment I walked out of my house in the morning it would begin and the pain would increase once inside work under the fluorescent lights. Later I began to notice that the sun no longer gave my skin that nice warm feeling when in it, it is now starting to burn. I've been to doctors. Everything with me is fine. They just claim that I have migraines yet they all say that they have never seen someone with my degree of current light sensitivity. Nothing the Doctors have done has help, from medicine to putting me on to an extremely restrictive but healthy diet.
I would rate my current level of light sensitivity to very high. I wear sunglasses now at all times even at night or indoors. I have to wear a hat outside to make sure the sunlight does not directly reach my eyes. I avoid all fluorescent lighting, flashing lights, or bright lights in general. The ONLY light I can tolerate with my bare eyes are moonlight and candle light, even candle light can cause mild discomfort with the way it flickers at times. The pain from these lights can range from mild discomfort to the most extreme headache imaginable depending on how long it is in my eyes. Sometimes, on my bad days the sunlight can make me feel so weak i almost want to collapse just by walking into it. The sunlight on my sun is another matter. I've always easily burned but now it feels as if it is on fire in a matter of minutes. I now live my life in the dark as much as possible.
My parents always refereed to me as the sensitive one. I don't know how but I generally can tell what kind of mood a person is in as soon as I meet them. I also tend to take on the mood of the person around me, especially if they are sad. I have always been that way. I've dealt with depression since puberty but in the last year or so it has been different. Now i feel... empty as well as depressed as extremely tired. My light sensitivity is worse on these days as well. But what is leaving me the most confused of all right now is when I have people over for a party. Everyone usually ends up having such a great time and there is such a wonderful feeling about but in the end I am left incredibly depressed and then I'mtired, grumpy, and sad the entire next day. (even when i do not drink alcohol)
I will admit until this year I never gave much thought into the supernatural or anything out of the "ordinary". I've always been one of those people who unless you actually smack me in the face with something like that, I simply pass it by unnoticed. This year I met someone who did exactly that.
I would rate my current level of light sensitivity to very high. I wear sunglasses now at all times even at night or indoors. I have to wear a hat outside to make sure the sunlight does not directly reach my eyes. I avoid all fluorescent lighting, flashing lights, or bright lights in general. The ONLY light I can tolerate with my bare eyes are moonlight and candle light, even candle light can cause mild discomfort with the way it flickers at times. The pain from these lights can range from mild discomfort to the most extreme headache imaginable depending on how long it is in my eyes. Sometimes, on my bad days the sunlight can make me feel so weak i almost want to collapse just by walking into it. The sunlight on my sun is another matter. I've always easily burned but now it feels as if it is on fire in a matter of minutes. I now live my life in the dark as much as possible.
My parents always refereed to me as the sensitive one. I don't know how but I generally can tell what kind of mood a person is in as soon as I meet them. I also tend to take on the mood of the person around me, especially if they are sad. I have always been that way. I've dealt with depression since puberty but in the last year or so it has been different. Now i feel... empty as well as depressed as extremely tired. My light sensitivity is worse on these days as well. But what is leaving me the most confused of all right now is when I have people over for a party. Everyone usually ends up having such a great time and there is such a wonderful feeling about but in the end I am left incredibly depressed and then I'mtired, grumpy, and sad the entire next day. (even when i do not drink alcohol)
I will admit until this year I never gave much thought into the supernatural or anything out of the "ordinary". I've always been one of those people who unless you actually smack me in the face with something like that, I simply pass it by unnoticed. This year I met someone who did exactly that.